These are just a few incidences which have me thinking so:
1) Last week my hubby hollered (yep, hollered) out the back door..."Son, get that hose out of your pants!"
2) My nursing infant sneezed, got a booger on me, and then proceeded to swallow it. (I almost threw up.)
3) My six year old daughter had to be told 10 times to pull her halter top up....her niblets were showing. (I know, halter tops don't equal modesty...but we live heatsville...so we deal with it.)
4) We had to get permission to attend my daughters school play...because her third grade sister had been suspended for beating up a fifth grade boy. (Heart welling with pride. Sigh.)
5) My six month old son is naked more than he is clothed.
6) My two and a half year old son constantly has his hand on his not-so-Oscar-Meyer weiner.
7) We take pictures of number 6.
8) My 12 year old daughter is wearing maternity clothes.
9) Number 8 is because the shirts were a dollar at Wal Mart. Now that is even scarier. (By the way....it is cute on her and she doesn't know that it is maternity..so don't tell her!)
10) My hubby uses the word..."quickie."
11) My five year old daughter stole tic tacs from Safeway. (Last night we were at a store and she asked for something and I said "you don't have any money." Her reply: "Mom, I know how to buy stuff without a dollar." Pretty soon her daddy won't be the only one with a rap sheet.)
12) Yes, my hubby has been arrested before. Long story. He did love community service though.
13) I get more excited about coupons than I do about number 10.
See? I told you. Get our double wide ready! I am gonna be queen!
Love,
The Queen Maid.
Disclaimer: No offense intended if you are a weenie grabber, a fifth grader who got whipped by a third grader, halter-top wearer, a criminal, a Wal Mart shopper, a pregnant 12 year old, or currently living in a double wide trailer. :0)
6 comments:
Ha ha! Now that's klassy! Reminds me of those old "you might be a redneck" jokes. More of those applied to my family than I care to admit :)
I taught my kids the "Beans Beans the Musical Food" song to encourage them to eat their dinner one night...Was that a trashy thing to do?
Becky, you crack me up!!
#10 - Is there any other option when you have 8 kids?
This was one of the funniest posts I'd ever read!
Truly funny stuff, Becky. I'm still giggling.
LMAO too funny!
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