All other ground is sinking sand...

Try not to kill over from blog shock.

I am actually posting.

The last couple of years have been a roller coaster ride. And not the ones at Disneyland...but more like Six Flags. You know, the kind where you start out the ride with clean underwear...and it is anyone's guess at the end if you are still fit to get in an accident. (Remember what mom taught you?)

As a broker in the commercial real estate community, in the hardest hit commercial sector in the nation, my husband has weathered the worst storm of his career. It has been nearly 3 years since he has sold a property. THREE years. I don't know about you folks, but in these here parts, we weren't taught to save for a rainy day like that. Holy cow!

What I have learned, however, is that God is faithful. Period.

I believe in God. There is absolutely no way that I can logically believe that we have survived by coincidence. Ten people in one house, one income...reduced to about 20% of it's normal size. All I can say is God has blessed us and protected us. Kept us (so far) in our home, when many of our friends have faced foreclosures, short sales, and multiple moves. People who have had much steadier income than we.

We have learned to completely live on cash and have let go of all of the training we received that made us treasure our credit score. (Our credit report is more like a rap sheet. And the number, I don't want to know!) Cash. Good, old-fashioned cash. We don't incur credit card debt anymore, ever. We use a card for recurring transactions that have to be pulled automatically out of an account...but because we have no choice, we pay it off every month.

We have actually grown closer as a family in many ways. Our budget dictated for about a two-year period, that we get rid of kids' cell phones (only the oldest 2 had them anyway), we got rid of cable, we drove less to save gas, we stopped all sports (there weren't many), and discontinued dance classes and piano lessons. We cut our dining out down to a minimum...and when we did eat out...it was usually without children and it was a treat to get 39 cent tacos. (Does this mean we lived perfectly within a budget? Heck no. We are still learning, but we learned really fast how to buy oodles of groceries with coupons, to savor every windfall...even a $50.00 perk from hubby's job...often meant we could put gas in the car when we didn't think we could!)

We sold unnecessary items at yard sales, on ebay, and Craig's List. We learned to live with one vehicle...a first for us. As long as we have been married, we have each always had something to drive. I have not only grown accustomed to it, but I have actually learned to like having one car. We do a lot more things in unison now. There is much less going in different directions...we are a team.

My husband's sacrifices have been many. He has worked 2 jobs and kept long hours for nearly 3 years. And anytime something surfaced, we have taken on extra earning opportunities. Cleaning out warehouses...(The Butler) baking for weddings...(The Maid)...and even had our kids selling candy bars to the neighborhood in order to be able to go to youth events with our church. Stuff for which we would have normally just whipped out our card..or tossed them some cash.

We have learned the art of saying no. Admitting to people that we could not afford things. We got creative when we had to. And at just the right time, God would provide our needs. Clothes for the kids (hand me downs...super great bargains at the store)...gas money, extra work, and so much more! We actually got to take a cruise this year as a late 15th anniversary celebration...and it was as if we were kings and queens. It was a treat...and God given...at just the right time.

We have learned to live the lyrics of this great hymn...

"My hope is built on nothing less
Than Jesus’ blood and righteousness.
I dare not trust the sweetest frame,
But wholly trust in Jesus’ Name.

When darkness seems to hide His face,
I rest on His unchanging grace.
In every high and stormy gale,
My anchor holds within the veil.

On Christ the solid Rock I stand,
All other ground is sinking sand;
All other ground is sinking sand.

His oath, His covenant, His blood,
Support me in the whelming flood.
When all around my soul gives way,
He then is all my Hope and Stay.

On Christ the solid Rock I stand,
All other ground is sinking sand;
All other ground is sinking sand.

When He shall come with trumpet sound,
Oh may I then in Him be found.
Dressed in His righteousness alone,
Faultless to stand before the throne.

On Christ the solid Rock I stand,
All other ground is sinking sand;
All other ground is sinking sand.
On Christ the solid Rock I stand,
All other ground is sinking sand;
All other ground is sinking sand."


I look at the fabric of our married life the last 16 years, and I realize that God has had a plan in all of it. He has been the solid Rock on which we stand. He has been "all my Hope and Stay"...my anchor. The Lord has truly made beauty from ashes.

In my absence from writing and posting in the blogging community, I have not been absent in reading. I have not been around near as much, but have been pointed in different directions from time to time and have read a few things. (I've missed you!)

A fellow blogging friend posted recently about a woman who suddenly about a month ago lost her husband. Her husband of 16 years. That resonated with me. This October will be 16 years for my husband and I. I believe the couple is about the same age as my husband and I. And the dad left behind children. I read her blog often, through my own tears. Becoming a widow, or my husband a widower, is one of my greatest fears.

I have been moved in reading her stories and have felt the pain in her writing. Her beautiful tributes to her husband and her candor have been completely thought-provoking for me.

I related a lot to her. I put myself in her shoes. I felt for her. I couldn't shake the feelings that were stirred up in me and I found this woman and her girls were on my mind often. I didn't understand why, until tonight.

In reading her most recent posts, I came to learn that there is one very important thing that we do not have in common...she does not believe in God.

She does not believe that there is a savior who died for her, paid the price for her sins, and waits for her in glory. I assume, from what she has written, that neither did her husband.

I suddenly found myself totally unable to relate to her. In that one choice, that depth and core of your very soul belief...we were again strangers.

And I found myself not just feeling for her because of her loss, but because she IS lost. We can all agree to disagree about absolute truth, the Bible being the inspired word of God, and have deep-rooted arguments about theology...but no one can explain to an unsaved person the feelings of absolute peace and trust in the divine plan of a savior.


God's word says that "For the message of the cross is foolishness to those who are perishing, but to us who are being saved it is the power of God." Nothing says it better, in my estimation. Nothing. Because this woman doesn't know Christ, what God's word says about her suffering, her circumstance, and God's plan for her life is foolishness to her. Not just foolishness, but she even used profanity to describe her feelings towards such a thought.

Does that mean that I understand why things happen, heavens no. But when I cannot trace God's hand, I have learned to trust His heart. There is safety in the promise of eternity, and perspective. There is purpose in it.

I hurt for this woman in a new way tonight. I won't call it pity, but really deep sadness. It is not by accident that God had me stumble upon her posts. It is not by accident that I would lie awake wondering why I couldn't shake her story. Jesus kept me returning to "know" her. Now I know why. I believe in the power of prayer, in the power of the other believer's testimony on her page encouraging her in faith, and I believe in divine appointment. I may never meet her, I may never see the fruit of fervant prayer on her behalf, but I know that God has given me the privilege of praying for her and He promises that His word will not return void.

How my prayer will be that she would surrender to Christ early and know His peace. That this crazy little blog community that put two strangers with opposite theology in instant contact, will provide relief and comfort in the power of the Cross...because without it...all other ground is sinking sand.


In Christ,
The Maid

Another fine dining experience...

Sitting here at the computer right now...with kleenex shoved up my nose...trying to prevent the dripping on the keyboard, well, is not the most convenient way to scrapbook the memories of my life.

But this one, I am sure, is one I will want to remember.

Somehow, last night, I came down with a raging head cold. I have been sucking cough drops, downing vitamin C, drinking orange juice, gargling with salt water...etc...in an attempt to avoid the inevitable crappy feeling I am dealing with right now.

Can't breathe. (Which I don't understand why air can't get through because every ounce of fluid in my body is able to just drip out....)

Can't taste. (I am pretty sure that this is what hell is like...never being able to taste. UGH!)

Eyes watering.

Sore throat.

Runny, red, rudolph nose. (Which is in and of itself, birth control. I'm sure the hubs loves the look!)

So....imagine being called to dinner by your sweet hubby.

He had exactly 25 minutes to eat dinner with us before leaving for the dreaded evening job. He made baked potatoes, grilled the perfect salmon, and salad. (Which, when you are sick, is sandpaper. Sorry to say I did not eat the salad tonight! Now, ice cream, I think I could do that.)

So we all ate this lovely fish dinner....each kid professing it tasted good. Even the baby hardly threw a morsel on the floor. (Which is his way of giving it a thumbs up.)

Shortly after, my hubby left for work. We all started to pitch in to clean up the mess..and while cleaning decided to give the sweet baby a few cheerios to keep him happy.

Cheerios are a staple of any 13 month-olds diet, I assure you. In fact, they like to wash down baked potato and salmon with the little donut seeds.

***And that is when the comedy started. (I can say that now, now that it is over.)

She #1: "He's choking!"

Me: "Quick, help me unbuckle his high chair."

(Baby gagging...starting to turn colors)

Me: "I can't get it unstuck."

She #1: "There...got it."

At this point, the entire brood of 8 kids was hovering around us to see if He #4 was okay.

I turned him over, began the Heimlich Maneuver, and nothing.

Me: "He is still gagging, somebody call 911, and go get the neighbor!"

(Our neighbors across the street are both nurses...I have called on them before for the exact same thing.)

He #1: "Here"...trying to take the baby away from me...and then just pounding on his back.

(Baby begins crying)

Me: "Oh there...I think you got it."

He #1: "C'mon buddy, get it out."

(Baby spits up and cries and coughs and is totally fine.)

Me: "Nevermind guys...don't get the neighbor...he is okay."

***I know. Totally scary. NOT the funny part.***

My oldest went to give him a bath, while I resumed paying bills at the computer. All of the other kids were running around doing the after dinner things they always do....

*Letting the dog in to clean up the floor.
*Fighting over who actually ate the most of their dinner.
*Tattling on the sister who still had to finish hers.
*Stalling on putting the clean laundry away.
*Spilling the box of cheerios everywhere as they returned the box to the pantry.
*Continuing to narc on the sibling that STILL had not eaten her food.
*Begging for dessert.
*Beginning to strip down to naked for the nightly bathing ritual.

...when all of a sudden..."DING,DONG"

"Is your mother home?"

Oh. Crap.

Those words never lead to a Publishers Clearinghouse Check...in fact, they are usually bad news.

Me: "I'm right here." (Walking to the door while buttoning up my pants and praising Jesus that I had showered and brushed my hair, and then remembering the stuffy, red, rudolph nose.)

"Hi, we got a 911 hang up call from this address."

Me: "Oh, I'm sorry. Our baby was choking, but he is okay now. I didn't realize that anyone had called you."

"Yes, ma'am. Is this the one who was choking." (Pointing to He #3, naked and in diaper.)

Me: "No. It was the baby. He is in the bath right now."
(Then realizing how bad that sounded....)

Me: "His big brother is giving him a bath."

"May I come in?"

Me: "Of course, come and check on him."

As I let him in, the stupid puppy went darting out the front door...as did three kids running after her.

Big, armed, scary officer heads for my dinner ravaged, cheerio covered floor kitchen...

Me: "He is back here, in the bathroom"

He followed me down my messy toy cluttered hallway, in through the master bedroom with laundry baskets on the floor, dirty laundry in a pile on the floor, and freshly peeled off laundry covering the bathroom floor...(ugh, I wanted to die)...

Me: "There he is. Son, did you call 911? Someone called 911 and hung up."

He #1: "No."

Baby: "Hi!" (cutest face ever waving wet hand from tub)

Officer talking into vest.."I have the baby here, he is fine." (Really...As if he had just nailed some suspect. It was hilarious.)

Me nervously apologizing for the mess..."Sorry about the mess, it is crazy here around dinner and bath time."

Officer: "What do you think the baby choked on?"

Me: "A cheerio. He eats them often, but one just got stuck and made him gag. I panicked because I couldn't get him unbuckled from the highchair fast enough and yelled for someone to call 911. I just didn't realize that they did. It happened very fast."

Officer: "It is always good to wait to hang up until you tell the operator that things are okay."

Me: "I agree." (Officer dorkwad...did you not hear me? I didn't know they called 911. I didn't even know WHO called 911!)

Me: "Thank you for checking on us. We are really glad you are there to do that."

Officer: "No problem. "

As I followed him out the front door, here comes my 3 year old in a diaper, my 9 year old carrying the worlds dumbest dog, my 13 year old smacking my 11 year old telling him to get out of the street with two cop cars sitting out front of my house.

Can we say, "GHET-TO?"

Me: "Oh, when I let you in our puppy took off running."

Officer: "Yeah, I bet he looks for any opportunity to escape all those kids."

Yeah. You are so funny officer Seinfeld. Now go eat a donut.

*** And as I walked back in the house and surveyed the mess...Christmas tree still up, cereal on the floor, dinner dishes everywhere, spills and splatters on the floor, and laundry...the neverending LAUNDRY...I found myself wanting to go with him.

Thinking..."Please let me go. I will do anything. Administer breathalyzers, paperwork, cuff criminals, drive the cool SUV and turn the lights on, wear the dumb vest and CB radio on my chest. Anything. And like you, I have the gift of sarcasm."

I totally wanted out of my crazy life.

Until this conversation happened...

She #3: "Mom, can I be done?" (This is the daughter who wouldn't finish her dinner.)

Me: "Just eat this piece of meat."

She #3: "I can't eat that, that is the tail."

Me, giggling: "No honey, that is not the tail."

She #4: "Fish don't have tails."

Me: "Yes they do, but not this, it is a salmon filet."

She #2: "Ooohhh, I love filet-o-fish. I haven't had that in a really long time. Can we go to McDonald's tomorrow?"

Me: "Maybe."

HA HA hA Ha HAHA Hah aha hahahaha....


And the hubby left just in time to miss all of the action fun.

The totally humiliated, seriously hot and tempting, rudolph-nosed,
Maid

Still laughing...can't wait to see CPS show up what tomorrow holds!