Thursday, October 2, 2008

How I may have spent the last 30 days....

I realize that when I started this blog, that I posted more frequently...and probably more coherently...but let me assure you that underneath this tired, maxed out, pregnant mom, zombie facade, there still lies a sharp, detail-oriented, eloquent, and sometimes witty mind. I am just sleep deprived and overwhelmed with life. (Yeah, I know, cry me a river.)

Because I am currently wading in the shallows, well, expect nothing more from this post. A little look into what may or may not have kept me from posting a whole lot in the last 30 days. Much of it is truth, but see if you can guess which of the 30 statements might be just a little white lie...

1) I flew to Hawaii for a glorious vacation with my pool-boy, Raul.

2) I ate 90 Tums...give or take.

3) I went to traffic school. (Duh)

4) I stole money from my children.

5) I sold and shipped a bunch of crap on ebay.

6) I gained two pounds.

7) I had to boil water to wash dishes.

8) I discovered that I like the taste of Benadryl.

9) I went four days without a shower.

10) I learned about calcium content in various types of milk.

11) I developed a love/hate relationship with cable news.

12) I lost about $200,000 in the stock market.

13) I just cracked up about number 12, as if.

14) I plotted the ultimate demise of the general manager of Home Depot.

15) I bought a pair of Jimmy Choo's.

16) I got two pedicures.

17) I saved enough money with grocery store coupons to pay my car payment.

18) I shredded paperwork from 1988 to present.

19) I killed the shredder.

20) In a fit of disgust, I told a store employee that his store sucked.

21) I lost at least 100 hours of much needed sleep.

22) I realized the only gold medal I will ever own is a bag of flour.

23) I cut 4 out of 7 of my kids' hair.

24) I washed my car...by hand.

25) I did over 90 loads of laundry.

26) I ironed for my husband.

27) I threw away my favorite pants.

28) I started training for a marathon.

29) I baked at least 5 dozen cookies.

30) AND I have been kicked from the inside on a daily basis.

***So whatcha think? Which ones do you believe? Hint: there are more than five, less than 10 little white lies. :)

Have a great weekend!
The busy, tired, and lying Maid.

4 comments:

Betty said...

What I think are lies:
Nr.1,4,7,9,12(hopefully),15,16,17,28
Can´t wait to see the answers.

Happy Mommy said...

Ok heres what I think number 1 is not true at all! Number 6 might be a white lie because this far along I gained more that that! Number 8 nasty, i hope that was untrue, except with the no sleeping you might be getting desperate... Number 12 is very funny and untrue. I really wish you could get 2 pedi's in one month but i don't think you did, so number 16 untrue.
I really think you are lying on the washing car thing number 24. Number 26 made me laugh because i hate to iron and you did not do number 28 either. So my guesses are 1,6,8,12,16,24,26 and 28.

chandy said...

Is #25 true? cuz that would be 3 loads a day for an entire month! Srsly? Time to start telling everyone to turn their clothes inside out and wear them again!

Bogart in P Towne said...

Well, at least you can't say that you are bored!