Dr. Seuss adapts for the computer age:
"Hi...I'm Spam. Spam I am. Would you like to hold my hand?"
"I would not could not in a bar. I would not could not in your car. I DO NOT LIKE YOU Spam you are."
"Inbox. Outbox. Send. Delete. This email stuff is really neat."
Until you get Spam. I hate Spam. I hate that I never know if I am getting a virus because a tagline says "hi" and is from a person named "Kelly."
Reason sets in. Well, I know a Kelly....so I open it.
The warning pops up. "Are you sure you want to open this mail? It could be from an unreliable source and you could be getting a virus you idiot?"
I know, but...it might really be Kelly saying "hi" so I must open it.
Why? I don't know. Curiosity mainly. I want to know what "Kelly" is doing. What is up in her world? How are the kids? Is she going to invite me to something?
Well, I am weak. Click.
Apparently, this is not the "Kelly" I know.
Instead, it is a Kelly who wants me to click on the provided link so that I can get a free sample of Viagra. It supposedly could help me for hours...if I had the necessary "software."
Darn it. I really wanted to be invited to something other than the weiner wide web.
I move on to the next email. It is from my bank. They want me to verify that my password has been changed by clicking here.
Well, I was not born yesterday...so I delete it.
Too late. Screen seizes. Virus acquired. Computer fades to black.
OH yes, that has happened to me.
And the grand prize winner, I get a "must read this" from a friend. I know the sender. It has got to be good, right?
Uh huh...it is my spiritual food for the day. It is the Lord set to music. It is Jesus on you tube. It is..."send this to as many people as you know or you are going to hell. If you are not ashamed of Him, do not stop this email. Something good will happen to you when you send this to your whole address book."
Thank you sweet sister soul saver...I am so at peace knowing that the minute I hit the send button, my name will be written in the lambs book of life. I'm pretty sure that my mouse is the great redeemer.
Yes, technological junk mail. When will it ever stop?
"Spam. Spam I am. Would you like to hold my hand?"
"I would not could not on a jog. I would not could not on my blog......."
6 comments:
Gotta Get A Mac! I have no spam no spam I am!
Really no spam with Mac, I love my mac.
And the emails, send to 5 people if you love Jesus, that just kills me, I mean come on people!
I also hate those 'christian' emails telling me that if I don't forward it to everyone then I must not love Jesus......argghhhh!
I'm with Happy Mommy. Mac=No Spam. Amazing. Cute poem though.
If I wasn't so filled with the love of Christ I would take a picture of my middle finger and forward it to all the people who sent those emails and tell them if they don't send me an apology email they will have seven years of bad luck and ugly children. But thanks to the Grace of God, I forgive and look the other way. :)
April you are the epitome of grace. That is why I love you. Is it called a bloggy crush if I know you in real life?
Or does it just mean that I need therapy.
You decide.
Ok...Becky the maid :)...I need to hang out with you...maybe you can rub off on me a little....You are a funny funny girl...I didn't kow all this about you until now.....how revealing is THE BLOG!
You are priceless and a gift from GOD! You have a special calling on your life...watch out Chonda Pierce...here comes the maid.....
Love ya!
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