More people to the gallon....

We all are experiencing the pinch at the pump. Recently Queen April lamented at the $95.02 she forked out as the fuel pump mocked her. I too have been scoffed at by QT as I shoved the nozzle into the 'Burb. I think I even heard a faint "na na na na naaaaa na." I mean $4.15 a gallon? April, get this, it cost me a tad over $120.00 to plop in a mere 30 gallons. I found myself actually wishing that I could fuel my vehicle with milk. For the first time in my lifetime, a gallon of milk is cheaper than a gallon of gas. Or I could fillerup with diet coke...after all THAT is what gets ME going in the morning. Right?


What baffles me even more is, that we don't know how to fix it as a country, or it hasn't been a priority yet. Oil companies are boasting obscene profits, and like APS and Qwest before them, we allow them to have a price-fixing, there-ain't-no-use-shopping-around kind of business.

I found myself puzzled that, in this day and age, "we can put a man on the moon" but WE haven't figured out the alternative fuel thing. I mean even Sao Paolo already boasts a city not dependent on oil at all. They are growing and sustaining crops of sugar cane to produce sugar ethanol. They have streets littered with vehicles which run on sugar ethanol. (What moon did they walk on?) Hello...this is Brazil, people. This is a country that conjures up images of lush green landscapes, coffee beans, and exotic animals...not economic independence. Geesh, I am so behind the times.

But apparently, I am not the only one. Our entire country is behind. Do you drive a sugar ethanol vehicle? I bet not. We are forking over $4.15 a gallon right now (while skipping vacations, dining out, health care, new underwear...whatever) to be able to drive a car. I think I earned less than that per hour at my first "real" job. This is not a luxury folks...this is how we get from A to B...to earn a living! (For those of you who are really earning a living, right now we are just pretending.)

I am afraid, too, that "they" are saying it is going to get worse. Yikes!


I laughed when a couple of the car manufacturers were offering a 2.99 per gallon guarantee for gas when you purchase a new car. That cracked me up..."Hey honey, let's go spend 35,000 on a new vehicle so that we can save a few cents a gallon." Yup...that is brilliant.


Apparently, the joke is on me. I am now thinking about buying a jeep. The only problem is that I don't think they make one that would seat my whole family.


Darn it.


So how do we, an average American large family, save money on gas? Well, first of all, we don't drive very far each week. We are limiting our trips to church, shopping, and other stops. We don't ever go for a "lesiurely drive" on a Sunday afternoon anymore. Our annual trip to California? Dumped. And well, we scour the ads each week for which grocery store offers the best gas coupons with purchase.


Our only comfort? My husband and I came to the conclusion that our Suburban may cost more to drive, but we are hauling around more people to the gallon than most. We figure not only are we sparing the environment, but we are bonding wherever we go. (Cheesy grin.)


How do you improve on 9 people to the gallon?


Try having 10.


Due November 6th, 2008. (That is what happens when the butler fluffs your pillow.) Wink.


So the new dilemma we are facing is that our Suburban is now too small. We will have to fork it out for one of these. Or maybe this. This is an option. I don't think this would work. (We are short on water in these here parts.) What about a couple of these? We could save on gas, although I haven't priced hay lately. Hmmm. I think we will have to settle for the 15 passenger van. It won't be so bad, eh? And since it gets the same 15-19 miles per gallon that our Chevy does, we won't be wasting any more energy, right?


See how green we are?


(In case you missed it, that was sarcasm. Don't even try to talk to me about cloth diapers.)


I'm sure in no time...Doc Brown will have perfected the Mr. Fusion garbage tank...and all of our dirty diapers will be fueling your cars.


No need to thank us. You ARE welcome.

And before anyone has a chance to say we are overpopulating the planet, blah, blah, blah...just think about how you will benefit from our soon to be 8 kids paying taxes and pouring their blood, sweat, and tears into your social security fund. Again, you can thank us later.


Lest you feel the need to ask "Are you gonna have any more?" I will tell you that we will not be filling the new van to capacity. Okie dokie?


So, now that you have digested that tidbit...ask yourself this..."How many people do you get per gallon?"


Sincerely,

The Knocked-Up Maid